Disclaimer: There’s a bear in there. And a swear as well. There are people with games. And stories to tell. Open wide, come insi – …. OK, that’s all mostly bullshit. There are no bears or games, but there ARE most … Continue reading
Disclaimer: My parents didn’t raise me right so I swear a lot. The number of dickheads in the world doesn’t decrease when you become a parent. In fact, due to a number of not-unrelated factors like sleep deprivation, boredom, boundary … Continue reading
Disclaimer: Yes, there are f-bombs in here. I’ve had enough ad hoc lectures about my use of language this week, so if that’s not your thing let’s hug it out and say our farewells. ***** School “open days”… They’re up there with … Continue reading
Aaah yes, the dreaded mummy judgement… We’ve all been there, whether it’s an online stoush with a sanctimommy, a sly jab from one of your in-laws or a verbal slapdown from a sprightly octogenerian when your three year old is … Continue reading
It’s widely-known that pregnancy messes with your head. The combination of severe body discomfort and fluctuating hormones makes you do some truly nutty things, like naming your firstborn son after Carrie Bradshaw’s boyfriend in Sex and the City. Or running … Continue reading
“Oh, I see that you’ve pushed a baby out of your vagina too. Let’s be friends!” Some of the more tedious aspects of motherhood are those situations where you are forced to socialise with a random assortment of other women based solely on the fact … Continue reading
So, the Bond’s baby popularity contest is back on again. It’s my favourite time of year, up there with my annual pap smear, getting my car insurance bill and having 12 months of built-up tartar scraped off my teeth with sharp metallic instruments … Continue reading
Disclaimer: Yeah, has swears. Beware. ***** The pursuit of perfect parenthood is a total waste of time. Striving for perfection in the realm of raising children is as pointless as the pursuit of other things that don’t exist in the real world either, … Continue reading
Disclaimer: Lots of sweary sweary in this one. Time to fire up that DVD box set of Downton Abbey if that’s not your thing. Oh and for the record – YES – I fell for this crap too when I … Continue reading
I had no idea that time would take on a totally different complexion after I had children. No-one told me that my time would no longer be my own, or that my fanciful notions of “being busy” pre-kids were just … Continue reading
