Chicken Schnitzel Cake (Version 2.0) Breaks All the Rules and Makes History

Look, I don’t want to brag, but if you google “chicken schnitzel cake” the FIRST and ONLY successful search engine result you get is mine.

This time last year, Hugzilla blog cemented my unique place in the annals of culinary history. The date was May 20th, 2013: also the date of my husband’s 40th birthday, it was destined to become a milestone day for the both of us.

There aren’t many things in this world that haven’t already been perfected and pinned for posterity on scores of Pinterest accounts belonging to bored suburban housewives, so it is extremely gratifying to be a pioneer at something. I am the Buzz Aldrin of savoury cake baking.

For anyone who may have missed it, a brief and tasty reminder:

Last year on my husband’s 40th birthday I made this cake, fulfilling a long-held dream of his to one day have a birthday cake made entirely of the meat.

I called it the The Chicken Schnitzel Cake and it looked like this. 

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Fast forward another year, and earlier this month my husband made the foolish mistake of making an offhand comment to the effect that I would never be able to top the chicken schnitzel cake, and I immediately saw red. Nay, I saw rainbow.

I’ve been seeing rainbow cakes all over my Facebook feed lately. Layer rainbow cakes, checkerboard rainbow cakes, swirly rainbow cakes, fondant-draped rainbow cakes. My mother’s group is all about the rainbow cake this year, and they inspired me to add a colourful twist to my perennial classic, The Hugzilla Chicken Schnitzel Cake.

And so we have, The Chicken Schnitzel Rainbow Layer Cake

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It is testament to my husband’s love for the flesh of dead animals that despite being coated in dangerous levels of artificial food colouring, covered in horse bristles from the cheap pastry brush I used and containing enough preservative (211) to keep Hugh Hefner in pool parties at the Playboy Mansion for another 50 years, the man STILL needed to be forcibly restrained from tasting it.

HE ACTUALLY WANTED TO EAT THIS. I SWEAR.

I won’t lie. It felt good.

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